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Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Jokes and humour! Keep it clean(ish) folks!
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X5Sport
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Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by X5Sport » Sun Feb 15, 2015 9:37 pm

This is a story of self-control and marksmanship by a brave, cool-headed woman with a small pistol against a fierce predator.

Here is her story in her own words:

​ "​While out walking along the edge of a bayou just below outside of Fort Lauderdale in alligator alley, with my soon to be ex-husband discussing property settlement and other divorce issues, we were surprised by a huge 12-ft. alligator which suddenly emerged from the murky water and began charging us with its large jaws wide open.

"She must have been protecting her nest because she was extremely aggressive.

"If I had not had my little Beretta Jetfire .25 calibre pistol with me, I would not be here today!

"Just one shot to my estranged husband's knee cap was all it took... The 'gator got him easily and I was able to escape by just walking away at a brisk pace.

"That gun saved my life!"

"Plus the amount I saved in lawyer’s fees was incredible....." ​
:ant: Never anthropomorphise computers. They hate that.

IceQueenX

Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by IceQueenX » Sun Feb 15, 2015 9:47 pm

I was starting to worry that the gator babies would be motherless. Much happier ending!
There is someone I would quite like to feed to an alligator right now  >:(

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Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by X5Sport » Sun Feb 15, 2015 9:58 pm

OK, what's 535dboy failed to do now..... :'(
:ant: Never anthropomorphise computers. They hate that.

IceQueenX

Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by IceQueenX » Sun Feb 15, 2015 10:04 pm

You know me so well...it must be an X6 thing  :)
Hope you had a good VD with no sofa involved!

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Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by X5Sport » Mon Feb 16, 2015 9:03 am

It was fine... :xmaskiss:

Spent Sunday doing weapon handling training.... :guns:

You know the sort of thing, load and unload drills, how to handle misfires and premature detonations and even delayed detonations.....and how to avoid them.. :oops:
Last edited by X5Sport on Mon Feb 16, 2015 9:10 am, edited 1 time in total.
:ant: Never anthropomorphise computers. They hate that.

IceQueenX

Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by IceQueenX » Mon Feb 16, 2015 9:39 am

Sounds hardcore...at odds with the vermillion mode of transport :P
Nearest I have got to a deadly weapon is shooting clays lol!

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Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by pvr » Mon Feb 16, 2015 10:22 am

[quote="X5Sport"]
It was fine... :xmaskiss:

Spent Sunday doing weapon handling training.... :guns:

You know the sort of thing, load and unload drills, how to handle misfires and premature detonations and even delayed detonations.....and how to avoid them.. :oops:
[/quote]

Is this some sort of reference to sexual activities?  Load / unload, premature, delayed ...  :blink:
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Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by X5Sport » Mon Feb 16, 2015 10:25 am

[quote="pvr"]
[quote="X5Sport"]
It was fine... :xmaskiss:

Spent Sunday doing weapon handling training.... :guns:

You know the sort of thing, load and unload drills, how to handle misfires and premature detonations and even delayed detonations.....and how to avoid them.. :oops:
[/quote]

Is this some sort of reference to sexual activities?  Load / unload, premature, delayed ...  :blink:
[/quote]

Only if you are:
(a) .... you
(b) .... 535dboy and asleep

I'm a part time member of Her Majesty's Reserve Forces.....and my weapon handling has to be independently re-certified every 6 months. :spiteful:
:ant: Never anthropomorphise computers. They hate that.

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pvr
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Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by pvr » Mon Feb 16, 2015 10:29 am

[quote="X5Sport"]

I'm a part time member of Her Majesty's Reserve Forces.
[/quote]

We are doomed ...  :o
X5M F85,  Golf Clipper, Abarth 595 Competizioni, Jeep

911 50th anniversary -
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IceQueenX

Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by IceQueenX » Mon Feb 16, 2015 11:14 am

[quote="X5Sport"]
[quote="pvr"]
[quote="X5Sport"]
It was fine... :xmaskiss:

Spent Sunday doing weapon handling training.... :guns:

You know the sort of thing, load and unload drills, how to handle misfires and premature detonations and even delayed detonations.....and how to avoid them.. :oops:
[/quote]

Is this some sort of reference to sexual activities?  Load / unload, premature, delayed ...  :blink:
[/quote]

Only if you are:
(a) .... you
(b) .... 535dboy and asleep

I'm a part time member of Her Majesty's Reserve Forces.....and my weapon handling has to be independently re-certified every 6 months. :spiteful:
[/quote]

Do you have an, erm, uniform?! (Goes 50 shades of pink!) I'm thinking it might be good to do a forum calendar as there are some fine specimens on here....535 can be Mr December so he keeps the clothes on  :)

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pvr
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Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by pvr » Mon Feb 16, 2015 11:19 am

535 can be Mr February 29th  :))
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Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by X5Sport » Mon Feb 16, 2015 11:40 am

[quote="IceQueenX"]
[quote="X5Sport"]
[quote="pvr"]
[quote="X5Sport"]
It was fine... :xmaskiss:

Spent Sunday doing weapon handling training.... :guns:

You know the sort of thing, load and unload drills, how to handle misfires and premature detonations and even delayed detonations.....and how to avoid them.. :oops:
[/quote]

Is this some sort of reference to sexual activities?  Load / unload, premature, delayed ...  :blink:
[/quote]

Only if you are:
(a) .... you
(b) .... 535dboy and asleep

I'm a part time member of Her Majesty's Reserve Forces.....and my weapon handling has to be independently re-certified every 6 months. :spiteful:
[/quote]

Do you have an, erm, uniform?! (Goes 50 shades of pink!) I'm thinking it might be good to do a forum calendar as there are some fine specimens on here....535 can be Mr December so he keeps the clothes on  :)
[/quote]

Er yes......would Madam prefer RAF Blue or Soldier 95 DPM (with RAF Blue beret), or even Desert MTP?

With the security situation, it would have to be a limited exposure, possibly 'eyes only' with a penalty if you misbehave!
Last edited by X5Sport on Mon Feb 16, 2015 11:42 am, edited 1 time in total.
:ant: Never anthropomorphise computers. They hate that.

IceQueenX

Re: Florida woman escapes alligator.....

Post by IceQueenX » Mon Feb 16, 2015 12:19 pm

Just had to employ the smelling salts!
Desert please, call it a delayed birthday present  :))

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